LEAD&COACH OUTSIDE-THE-BOX

       When you first arrive at my home page, you quickly become aware of the fluid movement of my provocative Chinese Logo. But, if you look closely, are you aware of the Champion Warrior coach,leader,athlete in the middle of the red box breaking free from the confines throwing arms and legs to the outside. Notice how the color of this figure changes from black to a shade of gray. Let me explain the subtle shifts going on before your eyes. The Warrior is trapped inside the box where everything is black and white( notice that?), right or wrong,good or bad,winner or loser. The Warrior knows that such dualities must be neutralized if success is to be attained. For example, loss isn't good or bad...it's a teacher helping us to refine our game and learn then move forward. Also, our opponents aren't the bad guys...they are partners who, because of their presence, challenge us to improve and bring out our best. Sometimes, less is more and soft is strong ( water is soft but wears away rock). Such thinking is counter-intuitive for most leaders/coaches but for the Warrior coach/leader there is no other way...we must break out and transform. But it takes sacrifice,suffering and pain to change, to be different, to follow your heart and not the orders of the masses. That's why the box is symbolically colored red, the Chinese color for fire ( pain,suffering), change and transformation. Anything that comes in contact with fire changes and transforms. Notice the Warrior goes from black to a shade of gray when exiting the red box.  Red is also the color of Heart and passion...meaning in this case, follow your heart and what you love...and all will work out the way it suppose to. Hopefully, I have not confused you and you understand the essence of this well thought out logo.
        So why is all of this important and what significance does it have in the work that you do? Only you can answer this question for yourself . However, I have noticed that extraordinarily effective,successful coaches and leaders seem to have a way of thinking outside-the-box. They are unusually inspirational and empower others to seek their individual and collective greatness. If you read all of my blogs on leadership/coaching you become aware of how much of the material is different than the norm, unconventional and refreshingly stimulating outside-thge-box thought processes. By looking at my Warrior/Champion Logo, I am constantly reminded about the importance of such thoughts while it keeps me focused on what matters.  This is The Way of the Champion, the Warrior coach-leader.
      Thank you, my friend and co-author, Chungliang Al Huang for creating this beautiful Chinese calligraphic Logo.  You're the best.

AUTHENTICITY AND THE LEADER-COACH

    Over the lifespan of my 35 year professional career in various aspects of sports, I can confidently say that thousands of athletes have felt deep resentment, anger, disappointment, dislike and disrespect for their coaches. My take about the cause of these stress producing and performance debilitating feelings is the serious lack of authenticity on the part of their coach, mentor, leader and guide. What they seem to desire is a coach who is first and foremost, a human being ( as opposed to a "human DOING"). They crave ( and I have been told this from the majority of these elite performers) a relationship with someone who cares( wouldn't you?). They want to be positively regarded,recognized, respected , relished and valued for their contribution to the system. In order for a coach to accomplish authenticity in the relationship, there must be love in his/her heart. No love, no coaching...it's that simple. The key is to give an athlete the attention they deserve. Look your athletes in the eye; truly listen to them; touch them on the shoulder or pat them on the back. Be present with what is happening right now, as if they are the only important people in your life. Just BE you...and let your imagined role slip away. Work at letting your presence be simple, comfortable, natural, modest, humble and unassuming.
     I notice how so many who call themselves coaches, act superior, play a role and fear that if they are themselves, they will not be good enough or that somehow,they will lose control. ( read the blog on Insecure Leaders) So...they hide, pose, pretend, posture, and play the part and while in the process, lose authenticity and become unconscious in a "game without purpose". They fill their egos while emptying  their souls. They sacrifice their potential positive influence.
     What I have learned over the years is that when I am myself, being present, transparent and authentic, I have a subtle transformational effect on whomever I coach and lead. I am MOST powerful ( not power over others), most influential, most effective and most happy ( that is numero uno) when I am being completely myself. And the nice thing about that is: I am not superior to anyone, nor inferior . I just am!

  Keep shining,  JPL

BEWARE THE LEADERSHIP ROLE

    What I notice about so many who "play the role" of leader-coach is that they take themselves and life very seriously. When this occurs, the spontaneity, joy, lightheartedness, and humor become invisible ( assuming these traits ever existed). In the absence of such characteristics, true,effective, inspirational leadership/coaching is not possible. Humorless,joyless leadership/coaching is an oxymoran. Basically, the "role" begins to define who you are and as a result, you lose touch with the real you...a human being having a leadership experience, not a leader having a human experience. You may have noticed how many doctors, because of total identification with their role, can only relate to others as patients, or case loads, or "the heart case in room 117". Such impersonalization leads to doctor/patient interactions that are  unauthentic and at times, outright dehumanizing. If you lose yourself in the "role of leader-coach", you run the risk of not having authentic relationships with those under your guidance. Remember that extraordinary leadership/coaching is ALL about relationships...the creation of safe, trustworthy,respectful,human relationships. No relationship...no leadership. Authentic, emotionally engaging relationships are impossible to create when you get too absorbed and lost in the role. Be a human being who is working in a leadership/coaching capacity and really understand that when you buy into "the role" model, you prevent yourself from being an inspirational and empowering and influential leader/coach. The cure for your potential demise as a good leader is AWARENESS. Be aware of how you talk and interact and treat those you guide. Is your role and the subsequent way you relate to others causing distance, is it making you feel superior, does it prevent emotional engagement, is it a block to being transparent when transparency actually facilitates realness and authenticity, the common denominators for effective guidance? My wife is an amazing person who works as a doctor...she doesn't wear a white coat ( Fly her "Role Flag", as it were).  I tell my students, if it doesn't interfere with your education, call me Jerry...that's who I am. I gain their respect, trust and their following because of who I really am, not my socially sanctioned title. I must let-go of self definitions and focus on being what I really am...a servant helping others to ultimately say:"We did it ourselves".
   Now, I refuse to take myself too seriously. I have somethings to offer you and beyond that, remember that we are all 98% the same...human beings and the differences are ONLY in our BELIEFS. Let me think about what I just said as it rolled off my tongue and into my computer. Who am I???   JPL
  

POWER QUESTIONS THAT LEAD&COACH

      I refer to the word "power" not as having power over someone or something but the power to...to lead,guide,influence,inspire and empower. In this sense, questions and the subsequent answers are POWERful ( full of power)ways to guide others forward. The brilliant Greek philosopher, Socrates, taught in this fashion, bringing many of his followers using well thought out questions, to awareness on their journeys of life. After all, a journey is a QUEST for wisdom and enlightenment and from the word "quest", we get "quest-ion", the means by which we discover the where,how,what and why along the path. In my work, I am always using questions to help lead and coach others. I encourage them( give them courage)  to search for the answers that ultimately reside within each of them. The following are just the tip of the iceberg and I invite you to begin creating your own penetrating questions based on the needs and directions of others under your guidance. Have them write their responses and use that for lively discussion ,learning and awareness.

1) What are the tangibles you bring to the group/team?
2) What are the intangibles?
3) What 5 things do you LOVE about your sport/life?
4) What are your personal goals for this next few months,what are the obstacles, how will you hurdle them? Be very specific...measurable items.
5) If you freed self to perform to your capacity, what do you imagine is possible?
6) What are 3 ways that I can best serve the group/team?
7) What book, music, person, poems INSPIRE you? How can you use it to help your performance?
8) What 5 specific behaviors/things can I do each day that will make me happy?
9) What athlete/person do you admire and why? What 3 behaviors define this individual and how can you begin to imitate these traits in your life?
10) What do you like most about yourself as an athlete/person? Like least? What can you begin to do today to change a few of them?
11) OK, you may want to steer clear of Q # 11. Although I have personally found this one to be the most important  and penetrating Q one can ask in life, it can get pretty darn wild. And, it could require years to fully answer. Ready? Who am I ( really)?, Where am I going? Who do I wish to take with me?
   You will notice how most,if not all, of these questions are internal &  have a spiritual component. Remember that as a coach and leader, your followers performance has much to do with body,mind AND spirit. We are all spiritual beings having a life experience...as opposed to living beings having a spiritual experience...although at times this may be the case.
    These leadership/coaching blogs...web logs as it were... that I am writing at this point are the mere bones and partial structure of the body of my next book on Warrior Leadership( see Blog by tghe same name).  Although all material is copyrighted by me , feel free to quote and use but I would appreciate giving credit where it is due. In truth, all of this material is not my doing.  It has been developed by me from the wisdom I have garnered from others and experienced personally in my profession and life. I hope it stimulates something inside you as it has done for me.
   I might take a week off to refresh my writing button... The pause between the notes is what makes great music. I guess this may hold true for writing as well.
   Namaste',  DOC J

A LEADER'S/COACH'S CREED

  I WRITE AS I TALK...INCESSENTLY ONCE I BEGIN. But for this blog, I will cut to the chase and state what I believe to be the central belief of our sacred work of coaching/leading. It is something I have written after reading a statement by Rudolph Steiner on his approach to teaching and then, putting my spin on his philosophy:

REGARD THOSE YOU COACH & LEAD IN SACRED AWE,
COACH & LEAD THEM IN LOVE,
CREATE & CULTIVATE A PLACE OF HEART,
WHERE ALL BELIEVE THEY CAN BE SOMETHING OTHER THAN ORDINARY.

   This sums up everything I have been trying to say so maybe all the other blogs are seriously superfluous. Well, that is not exactly correct...the other blogs have their own merit as you will notice.
You decide. But for today I am done. I WILL be starting to blog on other topics in July and give all of the leader/coach energy to you to absorb and digest and discover how this may relate to what you want to accomplish with your work/life...  Keep Shining,  DocJ

MAKE LEADER AND COACH SENSE

You want to be sure that your leadership and coaching styles make sense. Here are my Big 5, the five senses of your culture that make sense in order to be a sensible leader and coach...and sensitive as well:

1) A Sense of Humor. If you take yourself too seriously, you are in deep, murky trouble. Your calling is serious business but not you. You are a silly, sometimes crazy yet great human and by definition you screw up, you fail, your athletes and followers fail...we are all human and this is what we do. I like to think about the leaders in the comedy series and movie, M.A.S.H. Whom do you like and dislike? And why? Guess what? those who had humor and didn't take themselves seriously were highly effective. You decide but the role of humor in leadership and coaching is imperative for the "safe environment" I talk so much about.

2)A Sense of Generosity. Think of coaching and leadership as a "giving process" not a "getting process". Look for ways to give,serve and help. When a follower fails or does something wrong, give forgiveness and tolerance and watch them get back quickly on track. Be generous with love,respect and trust. Care!!!

3)A Sense of Possibility( not disability).  Ask your followers to dream things that never were and ask.Why not? (Thank you G.B.Shaw). Promote courage to take risks and not worry about outcomes. The process of risk taking empowers them to keep going in the face of setback knowing that we  all learn and improve in that way. No Risk,No Gain is my mantra.

4)A Sense of Gratitude. Help others to embrace what they have been given...healthy bodies,minds, hearts, opportunities, work, life. Have them understand that all successful people seem to have a deep sense of appreciation and their work and performance becomes a huge reflection of that gratitude.

5) A Sense of Humility. Remember that we are ALL interconnected to something greater than self. I am quick to reming my seminarians and athletes whom I lead and coach that all of who I am and what I do is not my doing. Without others in my life...including those I lead and coach...I could not do what I do and would not be who I am.( "I AM"...see the movie/documentary by the same name...it's tied into this)
I am honored and privileged to be asked by others to work with them. They teach me all that I need to know so I can, in turn, teach them. It is a give and take and I humbly recognize and embrace that thought.

    As I read over this Big 5, I realize that without these, I can not do my work. My work is being these and from that place, my influence spreads...so will yours. When I disconnect from any ONE of these, I notice that I struggle in all of my life. I encourage you to practice these 5 in addition to all else that makes you shine. KEEP SHINING,   JPL

THE DORMANT LEADER

   I have have observed that every one of us has the extraordinary potential to be a leader. In fact, I believe we are all leaders yet for various interesting reasons, those innate, natural traits remain beneath the surface of our persona...in a word, they acquire the status of being DORMANT...asleep, untapped, hidden, obfuscated ( what does that mean?), frozen in time only to be thawed when the need appears. For example, there is a story about some people standing around watching a young boy pinned under the wheel of a car that rolled down the driveway only to come to a stop  on top of his little body. Amid the frantic crowd appears a 65 year old woman who lifts the car and directs the others to pull the boy from under the tire. She demonstrated the leadership qualities of courage, determination, integrity, fearlessness, sacrifice, commitment, and audacity, traits she never believed existed within her.
   Now, because I believe we all have leadership traits, I also believe that not everyone of us must or should  be leaders. Even if you are considered  by others to be a good leader ,  it not a good enough reason to take on that role.  You must have love and passion for wanting to serve others in this way... you must be eager and willing and ready to demonstrate those special qualities that we all have to different degrees. For those who choose not this path of leading,coaching,mentoring,parenting...that is just fine but know you choose so, not because you can't but because you exercise your power of choice. Ironically enough such a decision is, indeed, a leadership trait...so there, you are a leader who coaches yourself to follow the path of your own heart.
   OK?  Now, here is an exercise for us to do. List 10 traits that you will find in good leaders you have known. Be brutally honest and underline 3 of those traits that you believe you have or are capable of demonstrating at various times. Now, if you have been wanting to show leadership but have had the "I  feel this is not me" syndrome, take those three traits and write down all the ways throughout the day that you can demonstrate these as a way to give and serve others from this place of leadership. Keep it simple,keep it specific then proceed to watch how others respond to you and how you feel about exercising what were dormant traits. Only do this and be this way IF you have had the inkling to dabble with something new. SIMPLE yet NOT EASY...Yes?
   I'm leading myself away from writing...getting somewhat antsy to lead myself up the mountain and follow some deer... GOOD Leadership is a give and take...leading and following...it's BOTH.
   DocJ