Thursday, June 30, 2011

LEAD&COACH OUTSIDE-THE-BOX

       When you first arrive at my home page, you quickly become aware of the fluid movement of my provocative Chinese Logo. But, if you look closely, are you aware of the Champion Warrior coach,leader,athlete in the middle of the red box breaking free from the confines throwing arms and legs to the outside. Notice how the color of this figure changes from black to a shade of gray. Let me explain the subtle shifts going on before your eyes. The Warrior is trapped inside the box where everything is black and white( notice that?), right or wrong,good or bad,winner or loser. The Warrior knows that such dualities must be neutralized if success is to be attained. For example, loss isn't good or bad...it's a teacher helping us to refine our game and learn then move forward. Also, our opponents aren't the bad guys...they are partners who, because of their presence, challenge us to improve and bring out our best. Sometimes, less is more and soft is strong ( water is soft but wears away rock). Such thinking is counter-intuitive for most leaders/coaches but for the Warrior coach/leader there is no other way...we must break out and transform. But it takes sacrifice,suffering and pain to change, to be different, to follow your heart and not the orders of the masses. That's why the box is symbolically colored red, the Chinese color for fire ( pain,suffering), change and transformation. Anything that comes in contact with fire changes and transforms. Notice the Warrior goes from black to a shade of gray when exiting the red box.  Red is also the color of Heart and passion...meaning in this case, follow your heart and what you love...and all will work out the way it suppose to. Hopefully, I have not confused you and you understand the essence of this well thought out logo.
        So why is all of this important and what significance does it have in the work that you do? Only you can answer this question for yourself . However, I have noticed that extraordinarily effective,successful coaches and leaders seem to have a way of thinking outside-the-box. They are unusually inspirational and empower others to seek their individual and collective greatness. If you read all of my blogs on leadership/coaching you become aware of how much of the material is different than the norm, unconventional and refreshingly stimulating outside-thge-box thought processes. By looking at my Warrior/Champion Logo, I am constantly reminded about the importance of such thoughts while it keeps me focused on what matters.  This is The Way of the Champion, the Warrior coach-leader.
      Thank you, my friend and co-author, Chungliang Al Huang for creating this beautiful Chinese calligraphic Logo.  You're the best.

Monday, June 27, 2011

AUTHENTICITY AND THE LEADER-COACH

    Over the lifespan of my 35 year professional career in various aspects of sports, I can confidently say that thousands of athletes have felt deep resentment, anger, disappointment, dislike and disrespect for their coaches. My take about the cause of these stress producing and performance debilitating feelings is the serious lack of authenticity on the part of their coach, mentor, leader and guide. What they seem to desire is a coach who is first and foremost, a human being ( as opposed to a "human DOING"). They crave ( and I have been told this from the majority of these elite performers) a relationship with someone who cares( wouldn't you?). They want to be positively regarded,recognized, respected , relished and valued for their contribution to the system. In order for a coach to accomplish authenticity in the relationship, there must be love in his/her heart. No love, no coaching...it's that simple. The key is to give an athlete the attention they deserve. Look your athletes in the eye; truly listen to them; touch them on the shoulder or pat them on the back. Be present with what is happening right now, as if they are the only important people in your life. Just BE you...and let your imagined role slip away. Work at letting your presence be simple, comfortable, natural, modest, humble and unassuming.
     I notice how so many who call themselves coaches, act superior, play a role and fear that if they are themselves, they will not be good enough or that somehow,they will lose control. ( read the blog on Insecure Leaders) So...they hide, pose, pretend, posture, and play the part and while in the process, lose authenticity and become unconscious in a "game without purpose". They fill their egos while emptying  their souls. They sacrifice their potential positive influence.
     What I have learned over the years is that when I am myself, being present, transparent and authentic, I have a subtle transformational effect on whomever I coach and lead. I am MOST powerful ( not power over others), most influential, most effective and most happy ( that is numero uno) when I am being completely myself. And the nice thing about that is: I am not superior to anyone, nor inferior . I just am!

  Keep shining,  JPL

Saturday, June 25, 2011

BEWARE THE LEADERSHIP ROLE

    What I notice about so many who "play the role" of leader-coach is that they take themselves and life very seriously. When this occurs, the spontaneity, joy, lightheartedness, and humor become invisible ( assuming these traits ever existed). In the absence of such characteristics, true,effective, inspirational leadership/coaching is not possible. Humorless,joyless leadership/coaching is an oxymoran. Basically, the "role" begins to define who you are and as a result, you lose touch with the real you...a human being having a leadership experience, not a leader having a human experience. You may have noticed how many doctors, because of total identification with their role, can only relate to others as patients, or case loads, or "the heart case in room 117". Such impersonalization leads to doctor/patient interactions that are  unauthentic and at times, outright dehumanizing. If you lose yourself in the "role of leader-coach", you run the risk of not having authentic relationships with those under your guidance. Remember that extraordinary leadership/coaching is ALL about relationships...the creation of safe, trustworthy,respectful,human relationships. No relationship...no leadership. Authentic, emotionally engaging relationships are impossible to create when you get too absorbed and lost in the role. Be a human being who is working in a leadership/coaching capacity and really understand that when you buy into "the role" model, you prevent yourself from being an inspirational and empowering and influential leader/coach. The cure for your potential demise as a good leader is AWARENESS. Be aware of how you talk and interact and treat those you guide. Is your role and the subsequent way you relate to others causing distance, is it making you feel superior, does it prevent emotional engagement, is it a block to being transparent when transparency actually facilitates realness and authenticity, the common denominators for effective guidance? My wife is an amazing person who works as a doctor...she doesn't wear a white coat ( Fly her "Role Flag", as it were).  I tell my students, if it doesn't interfere with your education, call me Jerry...that's who I am. I gain their respect, trust and their following because of who I really am, not my socially sanctioned title. I must let-go of self definitions and focus on being what I really am...a servant helping others to ultimately say:"We did it ourselves".
   Now, I refuse to take myself too seriously. I have somethings to offer you and beyond that, remember that we are all 98% the same...human beings and the differences are ONLY in our BELIEFS. Let me think about what I just said as it rolled off my tongue and into my computer. Who am I???   JPL
  

Thursday, June 23, 2011

POWER QUESTIONS THAT LEAD&COACH

      I refer to the word "power" not as having power over someone or something but the power to...to lead,guide,influence,inspire and empower. In this sense, questions and the subsequent answers are POWERful ( full of power)ways to guide others forward. The brilliant Greek philosopher, Socrates, taught in this fashion, bringing many of his followers using well thought out questions, to awareness on their journeys of life. After all, a journey is a QUEST for wisdom and enlightenment and from the word "quest", we get "quest-ion", the means by which we discover the where,how,what and why along the path. In my work, I am always using questions to help lead and coach others. I encourage them( give them courage)  to search for the answers that ultimately reside within each of them. The following are just the tip of the iceberg and I invite you to begin creating your own penetrating questions based on the needs and directions of others under your guidance. Have them write their responses and use that for lively discussion ,learning and awareness.

1) What are the tangibles you bring to the group/team?
2) What are the intangibles?
3) What 5 things do you LOVE about your sport/life?
4) What are your personal goals for this next few months,what are the obstacles, how will you hurdle them? Be very specific...measurable items.
5) If you freed self to perform to your capacity, what do you imagine is possible?
6) What are 3 ways that I can best serve the group/team?
7) What book, music, person, poems INSPIRE you? How can you use it to help your performance?
8) What 5 specific behaviors/things can I do each day that will make me happy?
9) What athlete/person do you admire and why? What 3 behaviors define this individual and how can you begin to imitate these traits in your life?
10) What do you like most about yourself as an athlete/person? Like least? What can you begin to do today to change a few of them?
11) OK, you may want to steer clear of Q # 11. Although I have personally found this one to be the most important  and penetrating Q one can ask in life, it can get pretty darn wild. And, it could require years to fully answer. Ready? Who am I ( really)?, Where am I going? Who do I wish to take with me?
   You will notice how most,if not all, of these questions are internal &  have a spiritual component. Remember that as a coach and leader, your followers performance has much to do with body,mind AND spirit. We are all spiritual beings having a life experience...as opposed to living beings having a spiritual experience...although at times this may be the case.
    These leadership/coaching blogs...web logs as it were... that I am writing at this point are the mere bones and partial structure of the body of my next book on Warrior Leadership( see Blog by tghe same name).  Although all material is copyrighted by me , feel free to quote and use but I would appreciate giving credit where it is due. In truth, all of this material is not my doing.  It has been developed by me from the wisdom I have garnered from others and experienced personally in my profession and life. I hope it stimulates something inside you as it has done for me.
   I might take a week off to refresh my writing button... The pause between the notes is what makes great music. I guess this may hold true for writing as well.
   Namaste',  DOC J

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

A LEADER'S/COACH'S CREED

  I WRITE AS I TALK...INCESSENTLY ONCE I BEGIN. But for this blog, I will cut to the chase and state what I believe to be the central belief of our sacred work of coaching/leading. It is something I have written after reading a statement by Rudolph Steiner on his approach to teaching and then, putting my spin on his philosophy:

REGARD THOSE YOU COACH & LEAD IN SACRED AWE,
COACH & LEAD THEM IN LOVE,
CREATE & CULTIVATE A PLACE OF HEART,
WHERE ALL BELIEVE THEY CAN BE SOMETHING OTHER THAN ORDINARY.

   This sums up everything I have been trying to say so maybe all the other blogs are seriously superfluous. Well, that is not exactly correct...the other blogs have their own merit as you will notice.
You decide. But for today I am done. I WILL be starting to blog on other topics in July and give all of the leader/coach energy to you to absorb and digest and discover how this may relate to what you want to accomplish with your work/life...  Keep Shining,  DocJ

MAKE LEADER AND COACH SENSE

You want to be sure that your leadership and coaching styles make sense. Here are my Big 5, the five senses of your culture that make sense in order to be a sensible leader and coach...and sensitive as well:

1) A Sense of Humor. If you take yourself too seriously, you are in deep, murky trouble. Your calling is serious business but not you. You are a silly, sometimes crazy yet great human and by definition you screw up, you fail, your athletes and followers fail...we are all human and this is what we do. I like to think about the leaders in the comedy series and movie, M.A.S.H. Whom do you like and dislike? And why? Guess what? those who had humor and didn't take themselves seriously were highly effective. You decide but the role of humor in leadership and coaching is imperative for the "safe environment" I talk so much about.

2)A Sense of Generosity. Think of coaching and leadership as a "giving process" not a "getting process". Look for ways to give,serve and help. When a follower fails or does something wrong, give forgiveness and tolerance and watch them get back quickly on track. Be generous with love,respect and trust. Care!!!

3)A Sense of Possibility( not disability).  Ask your followers to dream things that never were and ask.Why not? (Thank you G.B.Shaw). Promote courage to take risks and not worry about outcomes. The process of risk taking empowers them to keep going in the face of setback knowing that we  all learn and improve in that way. No Risk,No Gain is my mantra.

4)A Sense of Gratitude. Help others to embrace what they have been given...healthy bodies,minds, hearts, opportunities, work, life. Have them understand that all successful people seem to have a deep sense of appreciation and their work and performance becomes a huge reflection of that gratitude.

5) A Sense of Humility. Remember that we are ALL interconnected to something greater than self. I am quick to reming my seminarians and athletes whom I lead and coach that all of who I am and what I do is not my doing. Without others in my life...including those I lead and coach...I could not do what I do and would not be who I am.( "I AM"...see the movie/documentary by the same name...it's tied into this)
I am honored and privileged to be asked by others to work with them. They teach me all that I need to know so I can, in turn, teach them. It is a give and take and I humbly recognize and embrace that thought.

    As I read over this Big 5, I realize that without these, I can not do my work. My work is being these and from that place, my influence spreads...so will yours. When I disconnect from any ONE of these, I notice that I struggle in all of my life. I encourage you to practice these 5 in addition to all else that makes you shine. KEEP SHINING,   JPL

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

THE DORMANT LEADER

   I have have observed that every one of us has the extraordinary potential to be a leader. In fact, I believe we are all leaders yet for various interesting reasons, those innate, natural traits remain beneath the surface of our persona...in a word, they acquire the status of being DORMANT...asleep, untapped, hidden, obfuscated ( what does that mean?), frozen in time only to be thawed when the need appears. For example, there is a story about some people standing around watching a young boy pinned under the wheel of a car that rolled down the driveway only to come to a stop  on top of his little body. Amid the frantic crowd appears a 65 year old woman who lifts the car and directs the others to pull the boy from under the tire. She demonstrated the leadership qualities of courage, determination, integrity, fearlessness, sacrifice, commitment, and audacity, traits she never believed existed within her.
   Now, because I believe we all have leadership traits, I also believe that not everyone of us must or should  be leaders. Even if you are considered  by others to be a good leader ,  it not a good enough reason to take on that role.  You must have love and passion for wanting to serve others in this way... you must be eager and willing and ready to demonstrate those special qualities that we all have to different degrees. For those who choose not this path of leading,coaching,mentoring,parenting...that is just fine but know you choose so, not because you can't but because you exercise your power of choice. Ironically enough such a decision is, indeed, a leadership trait...so there, you are a leader who coaches yourself to follow the path of your own heart.
   OK?  Now, here is an exercise for us to do. List 10 traits that you will find in good leaders you have known. Be brutally honest and underline 3 of those traits that you believe you have or are capable of demonstrating at various times. Now, if you have been wanting to show leadership but have had the "I  feel this is not me" syndrome, take those three traits and write down all the ways throughout the day that you can demonstrate these as a way to give and serve others from this place of leadership. Keep it simple,keep it specific then proceed to watch how others respond to you and how you feel about exercising what were dormant traits. Only do this and be this way IF you have had the inkling to dabble with something new. SIMPLE yet NOT EASY...Yes?
   I'm leading myself away from writing...getting somewhat antsy to lead myself up the mountain and follow some deer... GOOD Leadership is a give and take...leading and following...it's BOTH.
   DocJ

LEADERSHIP INFLUENCE AND READINESS

    How often do we as coaches and leaders become frustrated, upset, annoyed, perturbed, confused, puzzled, disgusted, perplexed or completely baffled by our seemingly inability to perform our task of leading and coaching others. I can't begin to tell you how many times I have seen this happen. For example I was talking with a coach recently who was concerned about three of his very talented athletes who were not listening and following his program. He was completely frustrated that he could not motivate these kids to raise their level of commitment to "go the distance" and realize their full potential. He was taking it very personally and was beginning to see himself as a failure, one who is inept, incapable of doing what he was hired to do. Truth is, bus drivers can not transport another unless they get on the bus.( have you noticed how often busses have the name "coach" written on the side?...there is a reason for this). So it is as a leader and coach. The person must get on board with you( the bus) and be ready to travel to places they never dreamed possible. In Chinese there is a compelling expression that addresses this point: "when the student is READY, the teacher appears". Yes, and the teacher is usually there but without being ready, those followers are not aware of his/her presence.
     Over the past 35 years of marinating my nervous system in the juices of leadership and coaching work , what I notice is that no one can motivate others to move forward. You can inspire and empower them but they must want to move forward and when they do, the motivation comes from within themselves. Change and growth is an extraordinary inner process and the work of a good leader is to be patient, persevere and persist on nurturing and supporting , guiding and directing others in an environment that is emotionally safe where failure and taking risks are necessary components of advancement, not excuses for setbacks. Your work as leader and coach is to add fuel to an already burning pilot light within your proteges. This is called INFLUENCE( Yes, in-flew whence when ready :-)). And, know that your influence is NEVER neutral. You are either fueling the fire or dousing the flames. As you read all of my posts on leadership and coaching, you begin to see a constant theme. When you create a safe environment, you accelerate the process of readiness for others to be led. From this safe ,sacred place, they will open their hearts to you and give you permission to enter. When you do, you will be able to do your best work. You will INSPIRE, EMPOWER AND INFLUENCE them to believe in themselves, to believe in you and to believe that they can be and do something other than ordinary.
    If those you lead and coach are not moving forward, don't call 911... and don't try to motivate them...that is impossible to do. Instead, create a healthy relationship and environment that is emotionally safe( where failure is ok because it is our best teacher,guru,mentor), listen to them, offer your help and become the beacon that lights up the path. If they don't follow, keep trying, don't give up, don't ever give up AND do not take it personally. Everyone has a different learning curve. And don't disregard the possibility that following your path, what you think is best for everyone, may not be in their best interests. Don't internalize their choice. It's not about you...you're not a bad or inept coach. If you discover that they want out, if they want something different, are burned out ,  then simply ask if they want you to release them to follow their hearts and discover what excites and energizes them. In another sense, to do such,to release them on another path is to be a very good coach. They will love you forever. I never witnessed a bus driver get off the bus and pull,shove or coerce a pedestrian to get aboard. But recently, a driver asked me at the airport, "are you getting on? ". To which I replied, "no thank you, I am waiting for someone to pick me up".  Coaching is not much different.Ask those you lead: do you still want me to coach you, to bring you along? Let me know when you are ready and maybe I will still be here.
    More later,  DocJ
  

Thursday, June 16, 2011

TRUSTING THE LEADERSHIP PROCESS

The mighty Mississippi River moves slowly at times,only to rapidly speed up in the narrows. Then as it reverses direction and it appears like it is off course returning to the start... only to reverse itself again as it heads to it's destination, a total of 2,348 miles. If you were in a kayak on the river, you might get nervous and think you were going in the wrong direction. If you trusted the flow you would know that it was a temporary setback and not get out of the boat and give up on your journey because you trust  that if you stay the course, you will arrive at your destination. The journey of extraordinary leadership is like the river...it has many reversals, setbacks,failures and losses. You will plateau,slow down, stand still and then speed up and experience the "rapids of growth". All of this movement is a natural progression in your evolving process of being an extraordinary leader or coach. This is a process no different than those you lead experience. We are all in the same boat so to speak and this is the point where compassion for each others journey takes place. Only the great leaders and coaches of all time acknowledge,trust and accept this natural process to be so. When you grow daises, you would never think of pulling them up in order to accelerate their growth as they break through the soil for the first time. You trust that they will grow when ready, one millimeter at a time. The journey of evolving as a leader and coach may be slow. No need to panic or be fearful. After 35 years of functioning in leadership and coaching capacities, I imagine that I am perhaps only half way there still experiencing the setbacks and failures, learning from them and continue to go forward because  I love the ride...it has been an amazing journey of growth, fulfillment and joy amid the setbacks and failures. To help you with the process remember the following:

1)it's not about you, it's about them.
2)stay emotionally engaged to them, love them for their pure intentions.
3)know the difference between what you can and can not control. HINT: you can't control them.
4)forget about outcomes and focus on the process.
5)be real,be open,be receptive and be service oriented.
    
    Let me say that I do not pretend to have answers... just some observations. It has been said that there are two ways to obtain wisdom: PAINLESSLY from a teacher or PAINFULLY from life. I have discovered that the latter is far superior. You must learn to be a warrior leader through the ups and downs like the river. I simply offer practical guidelines to help you to trust and stay the course on these unchartered and turbulent waters of extraordinary leadership. MEDITATION, I have found, is one way to help stay focused,calm and relaxed throughout this process. Read my book, "The Way of the Champion" for more on how to develop the skill of meditation.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

INSECURE LEADERS

      So many who call themselves coaches or leaders operate out of fear... the fear of losing control over those they lead. This need to control stems from what I believe is a basic sense of insecurity, of believing that to be successful, you must force, manipulate or coerce others into doing it your way...or the highway. Farmer's have learned through experience that if you want to control the cows, move the fences back.  Only when you are willing to let go of excessive control will you,your team and others enjoy true learning and victory. Confucius says that great leaders "guide others and do not pull them along; urges them to go forward by opening the way,yet refuses to take them there".
      The TAO teaches that true leadership is to lead like you fry a delicate fish... lightly. Restrictions,rules, and regulations should be used but sparingly. Too many controls are not only difficult to enforce, they create counter-reactions from those being controlled and paradoxically, the leader loses control. Make smart boundaries, be firm within those and give others the chance to breathe and let their creative juices flow. Be like a good waiter...give them the choices/options, stand back and away and enter again when needed. "With good leaders and coaches, when their work is done,their task fulfilled,the people will say: 'we have done it ourselves' ". This quote taken from the Tao Te Ching( ancient Chinese book for leadership) reminds us that it's all about those you lead, not you,the leader. We are surrounded by so-called leaders and coaches who micro-manage incessantly and fail to see the big picture of developing,orchestrating,choreographing a highly productive, creative and functional environment. CONTROL stifles the process of extraordinary leadership because those we lead will find ways to sabotage all your efforts. They will feel anger and resentment and lose respect for you. Control is a form of manipulation that creates distrust and suspicion. Motivation and team spirit diminish in controlling environments. Set wise limits and then turn them loose as they discover their own greatness. Remember, every leader and coach need their students and athletes as much as they need you.
And remember the Golden Rule: treat others as you would like to be treated. YES???

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

LEADERSHIP AND THE RIPPLE EFFECT

      When you drop a pebble in the center of a calm lake, the reaction created is a series of concentric circles that ripple across the water to the most distant shore touching everything in its wake. So it is with coaching and leadership. Who you are and what you do comes from your center, your essence and as you talk,guide, mentor and teach, your words ripple outward impacting and influencing all within your world. And that influence is never neutral... your body language, tone, words, habits and behaviors will either light the fires of passion in those you coach and lead OR douse their flames. To create growth and change in others, follow the advice of Gandhi who teaches us to be the change you want to see. In a word: MODEL. Model the behavior you expect others to emulate. I am always perplexed by coaches who demand fitness and wellness from their athletes and then proceed to stand on the sidelines chatting and laughing and watching as the athletes run, lift weights and stretch their bodies to keep fit. What message does that send? When I coach a team, I always expect myself to do what I ask of them. I RUN, LIFT and STRETCH with them. I recall when a nutrition expert was talking to a group of athletes and everyone was tuned out. At first I thought the athletes were being rude but the truth was, this "expert" was severely overweight. Why would they listen to him?
      History tells us that in ancient times, the most respected generals did not seek comfort. They purposefully experienced the same adverse conditions...toil, hunger, thirst, cold...as their soldiers. They modeled what they expected from those they led. My dad was a high ranking officer in the New York City fire department. He often led a group of tentative, scared men into burning buildings carrying the hose and showing them how it was to be done. He was fearless and performed that way. The men were in awe of this warrior, admired him and became willing to go to battle under his guidance. In today's parlance, "he walked the talk"...he had integrity and courage. He created the ripple effect and to this day he is remembered, 45 years after retirement, as an extraordinary leader.
     Let the following questions help to guide you towards modeling what you want from those you lead:
1) How do you cope with failure?
2)How do you handle pressure and adversity ?
3)How do you exhibit patience and persistence?
4)How do you create balance and congruity in your daily life?
5)How do you deal with criticism?
6)How do you listen?
7)How do you give to others?
8)How do you accept responsibility and be accountable for your actions?
9)How do you do all that you can to be the best you can be?
0)How do you show respect and trust in others?
     How you express yourself with the above is how others will learn to express these items as well. You are the pebble and they are the recipients of it's wake.  Again, WALK YOUR TALK. My rule of thumb when in leadership roles is: Never ask of others what you do not do yourself... or at the very least mimick in your own life on some scale. My favorite leadership/ coaching story along these lines is about the time I was invited to give a key note talk at the NIKE/China convention on Leadership. The day before my talk there was a 5K race with 135 participants from the conference...all of them senior executives with an average age of 30. I managed to win the race handily much to the surprise to this young group.( they couldn't imagine this older guy being able to outrun them) I can tell you that I have never had such extraordinary attention at my presentation the following morning. They were ready to follow every word. I was able to use the race to my advantage. I lead with my heart, legs and passion and they seemed ready to follow where ever I went with the discussion, whatever I said .   BE THE CHANGE YOU WANT TO SEE.    DocJ
 

ORGANIC LEADERSHIP

     Most who call themselves coach/leader are using what seems to be an industrial model, a linear, authoritative approach based on conformity. They seem to "manufacture" good soldiers who follow orders.  The Warrior Leader, on the other hand, uses a creative agricultural model, one that is organic in nature not mechanical. They are able to establish environments where others will flourish. They are willing and able to "customize" conditions to the circumstances of a situation depending on individual differences and needs. With such personalized leadership, they "grow" proteges who, rather than follow orders from others like a good soldier,  they follow the orders of their hearts. The difference between the two styles is drastic: the first model is akin to eating greasy "fast food" while that of the Warrior leader feeds on organic, healthy gourmet fare. The former is more financially, physically and spiritually costly .  The latter energizes,inspires, and empowers the spirit...good "soul food". What model do you prefer?  Can I take your order? Can I fill your cup with love and heart?
     Keep shining,   DocJ

Monday, June 13, 2011

THREE SECRETS FOR GREAT LEADERSHIP

Someone once told me, that there are three secrets to effective leadership and coaching. Unfortunately, they didn't know what they were. I have no secrets but after 35 years being a leader/coach in some capacity,I have several observations that tell me what good leaders are made of. The following are a series of words and concepts that may be a good forum for discussion and opening to what it takes to be an effective coach and leader:
1)Listen
2)Serve
3)Vulnerable
4)Selfless
5)Flexible
6)Laughter
7)Influence
8)Step aside
9)Respect
10)Integrity
      There are others elements ,for sure, but without these, there is no leadership because there is no relationship and as we now know, extraordinary leadership is only possible where strong positive relationships are formed, chiseled from the work of the heart.
       I will promise you this. If you practice the BIG 10 above, those you lead will follow you for a life time.    That's it for now...I must go for a run...DocJ

MINDFULNESS, LEADERSHIP AND COACHING

I have been talking about the art of spiritual leadership and coaching throughout my blogs. I believe that it is imperative to not only grow our organizations,teams,families and groups,but to grow ourselves as well. As a leader, coach, mentor or parent, the self growing and expansion process is a spiritual exercise. You are a spiritual being having a leadership experience, not a leader having a spiritual experience. You are spiritual in nature with a body,mind,heart and soul. You are a whole person...you were born and will die. Leadership of any kind is first and foremost, a human endeavor. This human element in business,athletics and life is often sacrificed at any costs for "the bottom line"...results,outcomes,winning and advancing. However, it is now known ( although rarely understood and implemented) that the more attention we give to the human factor, the attention to personal growth and development, the more happy and productive we will all be. Therefore, I suggest that we consider our existential imperative to be one of emotional engagement . Relating to those we lead as spiritual-emotional beings rather than statistic machines who "get it done" is a great start.  One way that his can be facilitated is by being fully present and available  through a daily practice of MEDITATION . Such a practice helps you to relax, focus and be willing to understand the role of spirituality in transforming the way you see your work and it's relationship to the bigger picture of life. After all, work,sports and other activities are perfect forums for personal transformation and growth.  Such mindfulness ( awareness) practices as meditation  will help you to develop compassionate, warm-hearted, people-oriented leadership styles and thereby be better positioned to influence, empower and inspire those you coach and lead.
    My favorite meditation technique is "insight" or Buddhist vipassana meditation, a time-honored SKILL ( it is a skill that is practiced and learned)  of calming the spirit and clearing the mind by using our breathing as a focal point. Meditation helps you to become more mindful and present. This awareness process helps with all aspects of life, business,sports. The Los Angeles Lakers, under the guidance of coach Phil Jackson have used meditation as a way to reach full potential. It is a simple process that when practiced on a consistent basis, will have carry over into the way you lead and coach. There are many books that will help you to learn this easy mindfulness practice. My book, "THE WAY OF THE CHAMPION" is one such book that demonstrates the method I use with all of my athletes,  coaches and business leaders. Let your leadership style create an opportunity for personal,emotional and spiritual growth not just for you but for anyone under your guidance...and transform your world in the process.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

DANCING LEADERSHIP

Here is the next in a series of blogs on leadership and coaching. The DANCE that I refer to is twofold:
1) There is the dance between giving and receiving, receiving and learning.To be an effective leader,coach,teacher and mentor, you must be a good student and follower. I suggest that you be open,receptive and listen to those you lead because they can teach you about who they are and this will make your work more effective. When you accrue this wisdom, you,in turn, can lead and teach them as they can now more effectively follow and learn from your wisdom.
2) There is the dance between the two distinct axes of leadership, the first being performance management, the x's and o's of the business,sport or project...or life. The second axis , perhaps more important and crucial, is what I refer to as the Spiritual or Inspirational axis , allowing you to INSPIRE and EMPOWER those under your guidance. Oren Lyons,leader,caretaker and faith keeper of the Native American tradition and a member of the Onondaga Council of Chiefs,claims that you can't have effective leadership without spirituality. Without spirituality, you have a unidimensional approach which,in a work, is DISPASSIONATE, or the absence of heart. Without heart ( love,caring,kindness,respect, positive regard,trust)you set a tone with a team, organization,family or individual that is UNSAFE,unloving,uncaring and spiritless in a results-driven culture where failure is unacceptable and taking risks is discouraged. In this unsafe environment, progress and growth and change are inhibited and curtailed. Emotional cancer is abundant and proliferates. All involved suffer. What is needed is an environment of "emotional engagement", very much like being a good parent provides.
     The ancient Taoist sage and author of  "The Art of War", Sun-Tzu,reminds us about how to lead with HEART: "Regard your soldiers as your children,and they will follow wherever you lead. Look upon them as your beloved sons and they will stand by you until death".
     All the great leaders and coaches today seek to inspire and empower others. They accomplish it in environments that are safe, where those they lead open their hearts and give permission for them to enter and that's where a leader's greatest INFLUENCE takes place, where others will begin to believe they can be something other than ordinary. Don't be a wallflower, don't sit out this dance. Waltz like a Warrior Leader and dance the dance.
     I'm on my way out the door for a dance with the mountains.    DOCJ

Friday, June 10, 2011

SERVANT LEADERS,LEADER SERVANTS

      Taking my leadership/coaching sequence a step further, I wish to paraphrase an ancient Chinese proverb:"To lead is to serve,to serve is to lead". Personally, I believe that the sole (or is it SOUL?) purpose of life is to serve humanity... in some form or other. True service requires both a give and take: followers( athletes) give to their leaders (coaches) what the leaders need to know so that, in turn , leaders can give back to the followers what they need to know in order to accomplish a task. This is the DANCE I refer to in the title of my next book, Dancing Warrior Leadership ( see prior post about the Warrior leadership). In Japanese,the word Samurai ( you know this word) means servant or service with heart,honor and integrity.The ideal leader or coach is akin to the samurai,one who serves,guides,and leads with heart. The Native American tradition as articulated by Orin Lyons, member of the Onondaga Council of Chiefs, states that all leadership is meant to serve others. When I find myself in leadership/coaching situations...which happens regularly...I focus myself not by asking what can I get from this? BUT rather, how can I give( serve)? The more often I am aware of this mind-set( or is it HEART-SET?) those whom I lead/coach experience a heightened sense of self and satisfaction while I become more powerful,not over them, but power to influence and dance with them in order to help facilitate change and growth for all. According to the Chinese book of Transformation,the I CHING, "Love and Service towards others will create a spirit of unparalleled loyalty". Paraphrasing John F.Kennedy, I say: " ask not what your followers can do for you; ask what you can do for your followers".
    That's it for now...I must go loa fing ( see Blog on Tao of Loa fing) in the hills for my Friday run among the deer people, those four legged animals who always want me to run after them. More later.  DocJ

Thursday, June 9, 2011

YOU MUST LOVE TO LEAD

       Someone once told me, if you aspire to be a good coach,mentor,teacher,leader, you MUST have LOVE( not necessarily the romantic kind) in your heart. As the Beatles once proclaimed,"All you need is love", you ( me too) must have unconditional positive regard for those under our guidance. If this is not true for you, try another road. Effective leadership is all about caring, respectfulness,trust and service. I refer to such leadership as Wu Shi, from the Chinese, "the Warrior Spirit", OR The Path of Heart, one that has a clear sense of "emotional engagement". I am talking about the power to influence and inspire, not the power over others in an authoritative way, old school leadership and coaching. It is only in this way can we ever hope to create and cultivate in others, peak capacities and limitless possibilities. Such leaders,lead with their hearts not heads( EGO) as they guide others to learn from failure, take necessary risks( see my Blog on Risk taking), push past perceived personal parameters( say that fast 10X), encourage progress and inspire them to AWAKEN( caps intended) to higher and more satisfying levels of performance...IN AN EMOTIONALLY SAFE ENVIRONMENT. Interesting side note...most coaches crave mental toughness in their athletes AND such cravings proliferate in emotionally safe places where there is much love. You don't win tough competitions with talent. You win tough games/events by being tough and THAT toughness comes when there is LOVE all around. When I feel safe,respected and cared for, I will lick the dust off the basketball court if asked, and I will go the distance,all out, relentless...so darn mentally tough that I begin to annoy my opponent. I become a huge pest. I believe we all do under the right environment of love.
     In addition to this toughness factor, environments where love proliferates are filled with DISCIPLINE. When athletes have love, they refuse to let their team and staff down and this is what creates discipline in that sacred environment.
      Now, how do you demonstrate this intangible yet "feeling" concept of LOVE? I have many ideas that stand the test of time.  Attend to the deepness of COMMITMENT. By this I mean, talk about how to nurture the commitment with athletes to each other. Then there is the commitment between coaches themselves . Then there is commitment between coach and athlete and vice versa.  Such commitment is aided by GIVING to others... giving your trust, respect, selflessness, integrity,  and work ethic. Giving is, in my opinion, one of the more powerful expressions of LOVE. So we have Love which brings about Giving that then leads to Commitment. According to the late and great Martin Luther King, the most important question one can ask in life is:"what am I doing for others?".  How can I give vs. how can I get is a nice focusing statement to keep you on track. And remember this truth: you may think you have a lot but if you are without love, you have nothing.
    I suggest that you may want to try the RULE OF ONE: one athlete, one positive comment, one day at a time. Of course when you do this, it becomes contagious and you wont be able to stop like any habit. And you will see the results. You may say:" Hey Britt, I love the way you show up ready to play each practice. You really set a terrific tone for this team". That will last for at least three weeks when it will be time to begin again. Try this: send an email or leave a note in a locker telling another how in awe you are of him/her. Tell the group/team how fortunate you are to be part of their amazing lives. But most of all, always, every day, hour,minute, treat those you lead with respect,kindness and take good care of them. Be firm and set boundaries where and when needed BUT always do it in the spirit of the Warrior, just the same way that YOU love to be loved. When that happens, others will follow you to the end of the Earth and jump from a cliff and build their wings on the way down. ( a concept I latched on to from author Ray Bradbury).
     While this may be a "sea change " for some of us, it is simple yet powerful. John Wooden, former coach of the UCLA Bruins basketball( I probably didn't need to even say this) when asked why he was so darn successful, he quipped "There was a lot of LOVE in my coaching".  No Love...No Leadership. Next time I write on this subject I will address the concept of SERVICE: To Lead is to Serve.
    How is what you read relevant to your life? How does it relate to what you are trying to accomplish?

    Come back again soon...I'm on a roll of sorts. Let me know your thoughts on these blogs.
  
    Ciao for now with Tao,  DocJ

COACHING SACRED SPORTS

    Coaches may want to be aware more often about the sacred nature of sport...For many of athletes and performers,their relationship with sport,movement,fitness and LIFE is often a confusing one,filled with conflict,contradiction and confusion. So often there is this existential dilemma between how they compete or go about their training and fitness programs AND their deeply held values and ideals...what I call the soul qualities that really matter and make a difference. If you want more from these athletes, it would be helpful to tune them into this concept. Qualities like integrity,dependability,reliability,courage, patience,persistence,honesty and perseverence ...are how they would define themselves to others as individuals yet when it comes to working out, they fail to "work within" ( see my book "Working Out,Working Within") and not live up to our notion of who they are. they fail to realize the intimate connection between the physical and spiritual and as a result, perform "out of character" as it were. They seek to be genuine yet fear and pain throw them off track. They perform contrary to their essence , that which makes them who they are. For example, because of their obsession with winning,victory and being the best, they may resort to cheating,drugs,cutting corners,fighting and hurting each other to get what they obsessively desire. They basically become driven in ways that are inconsistent with the sacred values they cherish.
  What is needed is a new relationship with performance and athletics...one that takes the higher road and functions with integrity...one where all of our physical work, rather than be a battle against score,time,opponent and outcomes becomes and arena for the battles within against our fears, self-doubt and failures. We win these battles with "weapons of the heart", those very virtues that we hold in high esteem, those qualities of the heart that define who we are...the one's I refer to above. This is when profound change can occur and sport becomes the conduit for inner growth. This is when we live,play and compete in alignment with our hearts, that sacred space of greater meaning and value to all of our needs and accomplishments. As a coach begin to help them to narrow the gap between what they say they will do and what, indeed they actually do.  When in the space of soul, they will act with such integrity, they will do the workouts, the training and compete with all that they have in themselves. They will be courageous and committed. they will recognize the inherent value of the sport, the game, the contest and respect their opponents and themselves and life as well. They will be grateful for the gifts of health and wellness they have been given and make their physical lives a reflection of these gifts. They will admire a dedication to the little things accomplished with brilliance rather than the brilliant things done marginally.  They will be open,confident in controlling what can be controlled, let go of what they can't control( outcomes and results) and aware( Mindful) that they are a part of a larger more significant game greater than any they play.
  Encourage them to let their physical activity be an opportunity to strengthen their souls...what they stand for, who they are. Impress upon them that if they complete their daily work with integrity,they must be sure to complete their "workout" in the same way. As we do one thing, we must do all things.
   I'll be back here soon. Appreciate your attention.   JPL

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

LEADING THE TAO OF LOA FING

       TAO is generally the Chinese word that is used to mean "The Way", the way of nature, the way things were meant to be. In this series of posts on the subject of Leadership, I wish to suggest to all leaders the importance of showing your followers the way ( TAO) of LOA FING, the NOT so Chinese word meaning to "chillax, to kick back, to simply loaf.  This is nature's way. Great  music is the result of the pause between the notes, rather than the notes themselves. The pause is what  makes it what it is, otherwise you will just will have noise.  We need to consider the relevance of pausing in our lives...doing nothing. In his classic work,The Importance of Living, Chinese scholar and author, Lin Yutang,  writes a whole chapter on "the Importance of Loafing". Now there's a word most of us despise as well as those who practice it. Growing up,I learned early on that it is a serious offense to loaf...a major sin. Daydreaming was punished by the nuns in Catholic elementary school..."stop your daydreaming, Lynch" common words uttered by these poor unimaginative and ignorant souls. After all, I am here to tell you that everything I am today, every book that I have written, and my best work to date has all been the direct result of,yes, DAYDREAMING while LOAFING.   As an established and recognized professional in today's world, I must not let on that I love to loaf too much... after all, others will think I am not serious enough or busy enough...therefore not "good enough" right?  Wrong!!!
    Too many people whom I know WANT to look/be busy...this makes them feel important and needed. But this leads to complications. In Chinese, the word for "BUSY" clearly means, the killing or death of the heart. You draw your own conclusion. The only thing I want to be busy about is LIVING. I want time to have lots of clients and meetings and appointments. My clients are my family,my meetings are with my friends as we run for hours in the wilderness and my appointments are with myself as I take the time to create,write,think and design...a life that fits skin tight over my spirit.  I alos must shop for good nutritious food and cook lovely( filled with LOVE) meals for those important others with whom I share my life . Then, I get to do my work and attend to my calling ...with amazing,open hearted people, athletes,coaches,CEO's and give them the time they desire, choosing,of course, those who understand the importance of loafing. This is good leadership.  Daydreaming should be seriously scheduled in the classroom, boardroom,bathroom and bedroom. As leaders and coaches,we must set aside the time where we can meditate, clear our minds and create what we are all trying to find but too busy to find it and pass this on to those under our guidance. The better we all feel inside, the better our lives work  outside but this takes time.. .time away from the maddening pace, the frenetic storm, the closing down of our hearts and open them to a way of child-like discovery. That's what good coaches do, good leaders do, good athletes do,good parents do...what you will you do, TOO...right?
  More later, I need to go loafing with my sons and stare at the sky... DocJ

Friday, June 3, 2011

LEAD & COACH THE STATUS QUO



In the play "No Exit" by Jean-Paul Sartre, some people are trapped in a metaphysical, self-imposed hell - one room, no windows, crowded together and not able to leave. After they had spent much time here, a door opened and they were free to go. However, they remained because the unknown was too risky and filled with perceived danger. They had become comfortable with the status quo (horrendous lives) and lacked the courage to experience something much better.
This story is a perfect metaphor for many of your athletes or workers who have become comfortable with the status quo of their competitive efforts. Frequent encounters with danger and taking risks are presented to you in sport and other arenas of life. As a coach and leader, make those whom you lead, become more often aware that taking on such encounters makes you inwardly strong...instilling in you a profound awareness of life...bringing new meaning and richness to your experience. In a word, taking risks makes you feel ALIVE as they invariably lead to significant breakthroughs in your sport as well as all of life. There is a risk to not risking...think about how this applies to all of life. 
Let this paragraph set the tone for a new attitude toward how you coach/lead and how your athletes compete and why. The greatest "highs" in athletics have usually been the by-product of the courage you exhibit when you take the calculated risks to improve. Naturally, there are the failures and setbacks experienced when taking risks yet even they become your teachers as you learn from them, how to become more proficient at what you do.

LIVING THE WAY OF THE WARRIOR LEADER

     The Warrior LEADER dances with life. Ergo, the Dancing Warrior Spirit is alive when we adapt certain ways at work, with the family or simply running in the mountains of beautiful Colorado which I love to do. It is how I want to BE( since I am a human being,not a human doing).  The warrior follows orders of the heart( what is right) NOT orders from others ( unless you are a good soldier). Warriors fight battles within against self doubt,fear,failure...your stuff,your demons, your tigers. I find that in order to live like a warrior leader I must attend to the following on a daily basis:
1)Be Grateful
2)Meditate
3)Create...be creative
4)Contribute...make a difference...SERVICE
    When I am in this sacred space and live each day like this, I am HAPPY...and happiness is,indeed, a habit. It's a plan, it's work...it is SIMPLE...but not easy. It is part of the devine,a marriage of East and West, of science and mysticism.  See my blog on spirituality and leadership and the video about this on my video page.
     My mind-heart is filled with these thoughts and I hope yours are as well then I say "namaste",
     Love your way, JPL
    

Thursday, June 2, 2011

WARRIOR LEADERSHIP

         Here are some thoughts about leadership and coaching that I have been pondering on this beautiful, gorgeous day in Boulder,Colorado as I embark upon writing session today for my eleventh book,Dancing Warrior Leadership. The following construct/poem that I have created( a paraphrase with the inspiration of Waldorf school originator,Rudolf Steiner) becomes the theme and touch stone for all the writing I will do on this vital subject:
                                      
                                                 "Regard those you lead in sacred awe,
                                                    Coach and serve them in Love,
                                          Cultivate and Teach in an environment of Heart
                                      and watch as they grow into Something Extraordinary".
                                                                            Jerry Lynch,  Ph.D
                                                                                            
       Astounding as it may appear,most who call themselves leaders and coaches today are clearly not. They are using strategies and methodologies that are ,in a word,obsolete. If one is to a be successful, influential, powerful and compelling coach and leader,one must master a "way" or a TAO ( Chinese for "The Way") that can INSPIRE and EMPOWER others. Leaning on the Chinese language once again, the word for this extraordinary way of leadership is called "Jingshen", a Mandarin concept meaning "to instill spirit,vitality,chi,passion and personal power". In this way, leadership becomes a spiritual practice( not religious) that helps to develop in ourselves and those we lead certain SACRED traits,behaviors and characteristics...courage,compassion,commitment,patience,persistence,integrity,selflessness,
humility, love,modesty and humility to name just a few. When we exhibit these traits, we create an emotionally safe environment where others will open their hearts and give us( leaders/coaches) permission to enter and it is THERE that we can influence them to be something other than ordinary. Effective leadership is all about relationships created in this way. This way, this Tao, this path is the path of the Warrior leader.
    I better get back to my book or it will never be written. Stay tuned in. In the meantime, think about this blog and imagine yourself being able to create such an inspirational environment for all those whom you are so fortunate to lead and coach.
Much love and good chi,  JPL

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

LEADING OTHERS TO FOLLOW THEIR HEARTS.

Today as I approach taking a risk in my life, I remember this: WHY WALK WHEN YOU CAN FLY? Yes,Jerry, you are standing at the edge of the figurative cliff and scared out of your mind... your heart tells you to jump and trust that you will build your wings during the fall...then you'll fly. As scholar Joseph Campbell once said, follow your bliss ( heart) and when you do, doors will open that never opened before. Doors will open where there weren't even doors. But remember that following your bliss is a journey that goes up and down...there are challenges along the path. It's never smooth. You lose, fall down, fail and have setbacks but these obstacles are never as painful as those you encounter when you are not following your heart. Remember as the Tao Te Ching says, "we lose and in this way win". All losses are our mentors and teachers that help us to forge ahead. You get knocked down and success is getting back up. I know all this is true yet I am still scared,frightened by change and risk. But with COURAGE, I JUMP,scream and pray that all will work out not as I think it SHOULD but as it suppose to. In his book, The Teachings of Don Juan, Carlos Castenada reminds me that the only mistake I can make in life is to NOT follow my heart, that inner,deep voice called intuition. So, if it feels right I must go ahead and jump. I have been following his advice for 35 years and haven't looked back . FOLLOW YOUR HEART ( in French, the word for heart is coeur...how we got the word courage). I'll return...I'm loving this Blogging stuff...after all I love to write. Check out some of the books I've written on my on-line store www.wayofchampions.com.  This is a good day!!!